Husband in denial about ADHD, I have cancer

We were told a year ago that my husband had ADHD, but he says it never happened. I've been reading and trying to change the way I react to him but he is withdrawn from our marriage and gives his attention more to his adult daughter and her family. It seems he can only love one person at a time and she has been it for the last couple of years.

I've been recently diagnosed with triple negative breast cancer and need my husband now. He told me he does not want to take care of a sick wife. I'm now on chemotherapy and often very ill but he ignores me feeds himself, shops for himself for food and doesn't want to help me in anyway. He tells me I'm selfish and self centered if I ask for help. I have wonderful friends who bring food to me each day and he thinks they should feed him too, after all his wife is too sick to cook.

i showed him the Attention Film today hoping he could see himself in it but he just went into a rage. I am at my wits end, the only hope for our marriage is for him to get help but he thinks his problem is that I'm too critical. I love my husband but my life has gotten to be so difficult and I don't know where to turn. At a time when I need support and peace for my recovery, I have an angry husband who just wants to ignore me and do what pleases him. I think I could be dead for a few days before he would even notice and we sleep together. Anybody got any good ideas I feel stuck.