Okay this whole hyperfocus thing confuses me. Mine has been in hyperfocus for several days. Can an ADHDer really switch it off and on? If so how long can they sustain it and if they can, why don't they? Am I making any sense?

I have only my own

I have only my own theories...but I think it is chemically based. The chemicals released on the brain when 'falling in love' can cause it, the chemicals released in the brain when 'scared to death' can cause it. I just makes sense to me, but might not be 100% the only reason. I know it is somehow related. Also, if you read about how being angry (adrenaline) helps 'clear' an ADD mind, it ties into the same thing. Most ADD medications work by increasing neurotransmitters/decreasing their reabsorbtion (as I understand it) and many of these same brain chemicals are similiar to or related to the same neurotransmitters released naturally by the body under times of extreme happiness or extreme fear.

I know that I mentioned it the other day, but haven't you ever felt fearful of something and that fear helped you focus solely on that issue and 'fixing' that issue at all costs? (been meaning to research and see what is secreted by the brain during fear...I know adrenaline is..but wondering what else) If your child was sick and you were terrified they would die and you had some ideas of things to do that might save their life, wouldn't you focus on those things like a mad woman?

 I think that many things can 'motivate' change...like shame, guilt, and lack of self worth motivate many of the negative behaviors of ADD.

hyperfocus theories

Well I know this much. They hyperfocus on things that release dopamine..If it is pleasurable to them they will remain "on task" with it. So I guess if saving the marriage  which in their minds is "getting things done so spouse will be happy" lasts only so long right?

Once I am no longer in melt down,  I'm afraid he will move on to something that injects that dopamine back in there.

I know in an emergency situation I get super calm and fixated. Him not so much. I went into anaphylactic shock earlier this year and I while trying to breathe had to scream like thirty times CALL 911! he kept asking Are you sure? Uh no my body is blotched purple, I am gasping and crawling on the floor naked.. geez louise...I keep a syringe close by I cannot trust him to save my life. As it was..The paramedics last words I heard was "Can you drive faster we're losing her!"

Each day, each post is only serving to convince me I need to make tracks and FAST.

Which brings me to something Hole in the wall mentioned about the "I'm kidding comment. I know mine knows he is NOT and he knows I know he is not..what is up with that..When hubby said That's how I roll, I hear, This is who I am just suck it up. so he won't change but I have to suck it up?