My adhd boyfriend is exemplary in many ways- namely he actually does housework, he is also working on getting his finances together etc. The problem is- he still gets angry very very quickly and often times he remains angry for hours. To me these seem to be small things, such like- I did not look at him when I was talking to him while we were taking a walk or I asked him if he is going to finish the icecream (I should have just understood that he is going to do this) etc etc. He often times tells me that his anger is completely justified, because I have disrespected him. I can understand this in some situation, for instance I could vaguely understand him in situation where he is tieing his shoelaces and I am moving foarward slowly instead of stopping with him. However, I am not super attentive person myself and I feel that everytime I am not giving all my attention on him and anticipating how he wants me to behave, he gets angry. Things have developed so far that I really do not want to do anything together with him. We manage to fight at least once a day and that is when we both spend only couple of hourse together at home. I used to think that the problems were mine, because my adhd can be very convincing, but now, after years of therapy, he still finding new and new things he thinks I should change. I, on the other hand am getting more and more disappointed, because I feel that I have put in a lot of effort, but we are still standing in the same place as we were one year ago, with one exception- I am starting to notice how badly he often times treats me.
Anyways, just wanted to hear your stories that are related or any advice,