I am a wife with ADD

Well... I am planning for separation because I gave up on myself 

i can’t please my husband and I am full of flaws and I feel like I’m nothing but a heavy disgusting burden which fills me with guilt , self doubt and self hate 

but as a mom I tend to be depressed when he is around and I under perform , his criticism made me hate motherhood 

when I realized  that my kids are having challenging times I decided not to let our fights influence how I love my children 

im artistic and my children are frequently  entertained by my educational and creative artcrafts and they learn from me how to be independent, and be  cultivated , I always get compliments for my kids personality, manners and intellectual skills ... yes im chaotic , i hate housework , but I am always punctual , I am Always on time , I plan my day around my appointments 

i want to be out , my husband will be happier and my kids will not see me getting criticized 

i have limits , I know I can manage 2 children more than 2children + my husband 

he is organized and structured and I think he needs a cleaner private space for him away from me 

my antidepressants are my saviors , I love them !!! They made my life easier and my performance better i See life more beautiful and vibrant because the depression medication 

I am also taking ADHD pills which lessened my symptoms but not all of them ,,, 

 I miss my mom ( who passed away) she loved me despite my annoying ADD symptoms how can I forget her love and caresses... there is no more sunshine since she is gone from my life, I now know that I’ve lost the last person who made me accept myself, for who I am ... but it’s unfair to my husband ... I know 

I will never marry again ..... I want to be single for ever