Well, I am the ADHD, but I thought I'd post something POSITIVE.
I don't have much time to write this, but what I can say is that I never thought I'd ever be writing a POSITIVE post here on this site since I always used it when I was in trouble or in bad straits - which until recently, was just about most of the time. HOWEVER, for the past few months, my marriage with my bride has NEVER BEEN CLOSER. Briefly, some things that helped - I FINALLY found the right counselor who kind of pushed me over teh edge from where previous counselors brought me to - I just needed that final push. Unfortunately, after only a few months of finding him, he is closing his practice and moving out of state. Something also clicked to make my communication with my bride a whole lot better. While I am only responsible for ME, I would also say that something that helped was that my bride also went for counseling herself. Finally, I think another thing that pushed me was the help I was able to provide my DW after an accident that she got into - it was minor by all accounts and she was not injured, but it affected her a lot and I was able to be there for her and more present than I have ever been. For the first time in I don't know when, we BOTH feel like we've got each other's back, can lean on each other when needed, and can face just about anything together.
I did post this elsewhere, so sorry for the repeat.