I have just found this site and the relief I feel at reading other people's stories is almost physical. I have finally realised that there are others that have experienced my difficulties and it's an amazing feeling.
Sadly, after 14 years together I am realising that there is nothing left of me. I have dedicated everything to my husband, trying to support him and accommodate him. Sometimes thinking I have gone insane myself when we get stuck in these circular and repetitive arguments where everything he says is totally illogical.
He is terrible at socialising and so gradually all my friendships have died away, I am boring where I was once vibrant, interesting, chatty and engaging. I have put on weight where I was once pretty and slim.
I am uncomfortable taking him anywhere as he is so awkward in social situations so gradually I have stopped going anywhere.
He contributes nothing to parenting, other than the fun stuff - has no accountability for anything. I feel totally alone.
He can barely hold a conversation unless it's about him, has never been supportive during any emotional crisis I have had (eg someone dying).
He isn't nasty at all, he's just half a person, not quite there - he doesn't get it at all.
I am just an empty shell now and I long to be who I was, but I fear that regaining myself will be the end of our marriage. I feel so torn.