If this isn't ADD I'll eat my hat.

You all know from my previous posts what a mess my ex's life is and that it's been that way for a very long time. 

Well I just found out that he bought the new girlfriend a diamond solitaire ring that she is now sporting on her left ring finger.  

Yet he is telling his family oh, we're not engaged.. it's just a gift...

Just two months ago he told his son and daughter in law that he didn't want to introduce this woman to them because he wasn't sure it would last and that he didn't want to be tied down to anything. 

Then he spontaneously buys her a diamond solitaire.  Which, as you all know, has a lot of implications as far as society and everyone else is concerned... but to him it didn't register as anything more than "just a gift".

To recap:   He is not divorced.  He has been unable to find and keep steady employment.   He has next to nothing in the way of money saved.   His house is falling apart and full of junk.   He and this woman live about two hours away from each other and they have only known each other for a whopping 8 months.   

Additionally I was told by his family that he was at a point where he was going to have to start selling things off in order to pay the mortgage.    So my guess is he put this ring on credit somehow and will just never pay it.   

As you all know, ADD was never an official diagnosis in our case but from where I sit that is a gesture just screams of impulsivity and absolutely no thought at all to ramifications of a gift like that or to the bigger picture.

I am not so much hurt or upset that it's not me wearing the diamond because we all know the absolute madness that I endured during my 5 years with him, including the screaming temper tantrums and other verbal abuse.  Plus I have several thousand dollars worth of jewelry from Tiffany's and items from Louis Vuitton that he gave me... so clearly big ticket items don't register to him as to how appropriate or wise they may or may not be... 

....but I am flabbergasted at so many other things that I don't even know where to begin.   The over-the-top naivete around a gift like that, the fact that he is probably very unaware of what this likely means to HER, and the fact that once again he did something like this while the house, that he is barely hanging on to, still needs a new roof and has no heat.   I am also thinking about his children, who I am still close to and who have to deal with the emotional fallout of all of this erratic behavior.  One of the kids even still lives in the house that he seems to be on the verge of losing.  Ugh.

I honestly didn't think anything else he did could shock me ...but apparently I was wrong. 

Thanks for listening.