My husband can't decide ANYTHING! When we got to be friends while working together, I waited and waited for him to ask me out, but he never did, until I finally gave up and asked him out. (BIG mistake!)
The specific problem I'm facing is this: We live in City A, and he works in City B, about 30 miles away. He has a challenging job, involving lots of driving during his day. I work in City A, about a mile from where we live, but we hate our house. I've told him I am willing to rent a new house in City B, and take the long commute myself, but, since he works there, he has to find a place for us. The rental agencies are only open business hours, and he won't do anything then, even though he's out and about, and permitted to do personal errands. I can't get from A to B and back on my lunch hour, so I can't do anything. We gave notice last month, but still haven't found a place. I ask him, what do you want to do, and he says I want to move, but we won't commit to finding a place. We looked at one place, but he would not commit to it until after someone else had already moved in. I am afraid we're going to be homeless. I don't want to stay here, but feel so helpless because of his passivity.
I worked yesterday and he didn't. We cooked dinner together but he spent the evening watching tv, while I did dishes and cleaned up the living room. He had promised to do the dishes, he put the dishes in the dishwasher but didn't feel that doing the dishes included the pots and pans. He left those for me. He's out of his antidepressant but not his ADD meds, and I'm beginning to wonder if this passive, stare-at-the-wall guy is who my husband really is. I think he should be able to rise above his depression the way I do my mobility problems, and just get on with life. I take no step without pain, but he still thinks he should be privileged to do nothing except work, while I work, go to school and do all the housework. (and find a home in a city where he works)
How do I get some activity out of him, or should I just give up and do all the housework no matter how much it hurts, because his job is harder than mine? How can I get him to make up his mind about finding a house?