My husband that I am separated from but living with right now, blew up this morning. It started with him attempting to start laundry while I was cooking breakfast. I reminded him (not as gently as I should for such an unstable personality) that I planned on doing my laundry after breakfast, but told him he could if he keeps up with it. He declined.
He gave me the cold shoulder after that and a couple hours later, announced he was going to the laundromat. I reminded him how silly that was, considering mine was almost done, and he started in with the blame.
He's only been here a few weeks, but the old, bad habits are still there and driving me crazy. He has been recently diagnosed with adhd, but insists that our problems are because of me. As if I am resentful for absolutely no reason. I swear that I do try to get along with him, but since he has moved in "to help", very little help is happening.
I tried to discuss with him the incidence last night where he chased me down in Walmart to tell me how awful it was that I left him to care for our son and the buggy, while I ran off to literally run around quickly trying to find a specific product. He refuses to see that I did nothing wrong. Our child is small and can be kept up with at a brisk walk. He is still angry that I expected him to watch both our son and the buggy with my purse in it. Next time, I'm pushing the dang buggy or he just doesn't come along.
It got so bad that I told him to please move out asap and get a house in the neighborhood. This makes him even more angry and he accuses me of trying to keep him from his son. When I tried to explain that he'd live very close, he told me he refuses to live in the ghetto. Now how is that my problem? I live in this house in this quiet neighborhood, just fine.
I reiterated that he has adhd and needs meds. After he left, I posted several links about adhd on faceboo. Maybe he'll read them at the laundromat.
I am flabbergasted, yet not at all surprised. I'd rather be broke again than have to live with this insane thinking.
I asked him to calm down while doing laundry and to come back with a clean slate. I agreed to do the same. BUT we are so uneven. He expects that I smile while I give reminders about anything I expect him to do. He wants me to continue to listen to his every word, while he zones out and doesn't respond to 99% of the things I say.
All of the responsibility and change is on me. I have to stay stable emotionally when I really just want to scream.