It's been a while since I've posted on this site, as I'm no longer dating someone with ADHD. It took me months to figure out that I couldn't handle all the struggles that came with that relationship, but I finally ended that unhealthy relationship and haven't looked back nor communicated with my ex.
I have just recently starting dating someone new, and I have a hard time believing this person is even real! The level of care, attention, and stability is so much greater than I could have imagined. I feel extremely happy - for the first time in years - and feel as though I might have met my match. He is calm, patient, and extremely mature - all qualities I've been looking for.
However, there is this nagging in me that I can't stop. While I know this new man does not have ADD/ADHD, I feel as though experience has led me to believe that all men I date will have it. I know this is not the case, but I can't stop thinking in my head: "Is this a hyperfocus stage?" even though this man shows no signs or symptoms of ADD/ADHD. On occasion, he seems distracted, and I immediately think back to my ex. But this level of distraction is just typical for any human, I'm pretty sure.
I know this sounds like I am worrying over nothing, but I can't help but feel jaded by my ADHD ex. I was so mistreated - and for so long - that being treated well feels almost foreign. I can't help but think that I am getting duped or tricked again. I guess he had much more of an effect on me (and my sanity and self worth) than I ever imagined.
How can I stop thinking that every guy I meet will have ADHD? Does this way of thinking sound crazy?