Just starting out

Hello,  My husband and I have been married for 9 years, together for 14.  We have a 9 year old daughter.  He is undiagnosed ADHD and I am the non-ADHD partner.  We are currently enrolled in the self study seminar.  I just wanted to share our story and see if it sounds familiar to anyone.

Basically, I no longer feel like I have a sense of self.  I am very lonely.  I have been on medication for anxiety and depression but neither seemed to help.  We try to exercise and eat right.  But I feel like the way we live our lives have caused a lot of chaos.

When our daughter was born, everything got a lot worse.  We moved across the country when she was 9 months old to be closer to his mom so she could help us out.  Since then, my husband went from being a successful self employed IT guy to someone who lacks self drive and motivation.  I feel like I am always blamed for everything.  I have always worked full time in health care and provided the benefits.

At one point when she was 4 we tried moving back to where we had originally lived, however our relationship got out of control and I was afraid to be around him.  I was also very depressed.  So we decided to move to an entirely different state which we tried for a year but it didn't work out so we ended up moving back to where his mom lives, which is where we are currently.  When we returned we ended up selling our house which we had been renting out and have now been living with his mom for 7 months.  He travels out of state for work so mainly I am living here with my daughter and his mom and step dad.  I don't really have any friends however I have continued to work full time and am trying to make the best of it.

He said we are going to have to move again since he cant find work here, which leads me to have another round of anxiety.  However this time his mom said she would move with us.

He has never been tested or treated for ADHD however everything described in the course seems to totally fit our relationship.  I guess I mainly want to feel not so alone and that's why I am reaching out to this community.  He has been actively listening to the courses and I feel like this might get us on the road to maybe leading a happy life again.

Thanks for listening.