Looking for a success story

I just found this forum and I finally don't feel alone. Seems like there are a lot of stories about dead marriages, but I'm hoping for some to hear some success stories. I am not ready to give up yet. I'm feeling pretty hopeless today and can barely function. I'm contemplating leaving (again) but I don't have it in me yet. I love my wife dearly but our story is the same as all I've read here. I feel like I'm pushed and pushed and then finally break and can't leave the situation alone. I've been pushed so far that I've had a couple of full on break downs. To be fair I know I am to blame too and will openly admit that. I have mood swings too and my natural response is to give up. But as soon as I retreat I just want to fix everything. Does anyone else feel this way? I've sought counseling, taken medication, I'm totally sober, and no matter how hard I try I can't fix it. My wife is a good hearted person and dedicated mother. As a wife she has all but forgotten me. She says she loves me and would not have any level of success without me, but as soon as she is in a bad mood I am the kicking boy and she doesn't even realize the pain she puts me though. Any advice will be appreciated.


Thanks for listening.