Love and ADHd

I have been with the one I love for 2 years. I have plan to marry her but ADHD prevent us from moving forward .I have tried everything to get her to understand that I am here with her for the long run,but nothing I to do seem to gets threw to her and as I sit here typing 4:44 in the morning after a long night of going back and forth,one of many I wonder to myself Is it time for me to move on. How do you leave some one you love when you commit to not only them but to God. Sometimes thing are OK most times seem hopeless. I have empathy for her situation but she uses it as an excuse. The forgetfulness Is the cause for all the arguements and everytime I point out a bad behavior My faults are just pointed back at me.So the Question is how do you watch a loved one  on a road to destruction and they see no problem.She takes the medication and believes it to be a cure.  HOW DO YOU LET GO SOMEONE YOU LOVE!!! 

Response to letting go

Letting go is very hard.  There are the qualities the person has that you adore, mixed with the frustrating and hurtful behaviors.  I threw my husband out April 20th 2010.  Sept 20th will be 5 months and I still struggle with letting go.  We are not seeing or talking to one another. Just communication by text and e-mail but only about "where are the keys to the camper".  Nothing of substance.  I realize I cannot fix the problems we have.  We went to marriage counseling a year before he had his affair.  He was not honest and did not really participate and we were at the Hallowell center in sudbury so we were getting good knowledgable care.  Unfortunately I still love him very much in my heart but my head is telling me this is for the best.  I think I will always love him.  I wish I didn't it would make all this so much easier.  I read the blogs to remember how hard it truly was.  He was not in treatment most of the marriage.  He is in treatment now and appears to be taking his meds.  He wants a divorce, "wants to move on".  I am just a reminder of his affair and all his other lies and it is much easier to sweep me under the rug then to try to fix what is broken in his eyes.  I see all these blogs about the people having affairs, separating and then getting back together and working things out.  I do not think that will be me/us but only time will tell.  Initially I wanted to separate and go to marriage counseling.  Now I realize he needs to focus on himself and I need to just let it all go and put it in God's hands.  I miss him many times a day.  I cry often but I need to let go, which is a process and it is a hard process especially when you still love the person.  You heart says one thing and your mind is telling you the opposite.  I try to remember the good, but there was a lot of bad.  I don't feel he is remorseful for the terrible things he did and tends to rationalize them.  So I must let go, it is very very hard, and I hope it gets easier over time.  I have decided that if he wants the divorce then  he can make it happen and he can pay for it.  I am not filling out a single form.  It is too painful for me.  Best of luck to you in your decision.  My husband has a lot of gifts, but also a lot of dark qualities and many destructive behaviors.