I will be married two years in August. I am making plans to leave my husband in the next few months. I saw so many signs that there was something wrong before we were married but I let them go. We are both over forty and should be able to figure this out. At least that is what I kept telling myself. The very day we returned home from our honeymoon it all seemed to intensify. Of course, part of it is me. I have my own baggage that I have been carrying around for 42 years. But I could not understand why my husband was so childish in countless ways. From losing things, to being so messy, needing constant attention, acting before he thinks and especially...he never SHUTS UP.
We have been struggling to get along for almost two years now. I have grown to resent him so much. I can't stand to go home or to even look at him sometimes. I have no respect for him because he does so many stupid things and I hate him for what our marriage is. I can't do any more and I do not want to live like this any longer. Every single day is a drama. I feel like I am too old to live like this. I am exhausted. I am starting co-dependency classes tonight to try to help me see what I am doing but I am going to keep getting everything in order so that I can leave him. It is just too difficult.