Medicated and can't control symptoms

I am 45 years old and married with combination type ADHD with anxiety.  My marriage is falling apart and when we talk I can't control my symptoms and it is pushing my wife further away.  I can't remember dates and names,  emotional outbursts,  crying,  inability to sit still during conversations,  and having to take too many breaks to composer myself in order to try and have a conversation. It seems the harder I try,  the more I push her away.  Do I need more meds,  is this normal,  why does it make me feel like a failure?  I need help,  my doctor just wants to write a prescription and send me an article here and there.  I'm lost!