Moodiness/Anger/Irritability/Impulse Control????

I'm having trouble staying patient with my ADD partner and his moodiness/irritability/anger/impulse control...

I don't know how much of this is *just* ADD...?

He denies it's a problem, of course. ;)

I find when I don't react to it or stay silent and just let his words and actions echo, he realizes how he's acted inappropriately and tends to feel very badly about it, even apologetic. If I get nasty in response to it, oh boy, look out! Big--loooong---fight!! So I've learned, after reading "The Dance of Anger", to just calmly let him know how I feel and then if he reacts poorly I just let him "own" it. He can fight with himself!!! I'm too tired to 'dance' along... Plus I'm DYING for peace in my life again!!!

But sometimes his nasty ways get the best of me and I just want to know if anyone else has had to deal with this as one of their main ADD partner's issues?

How much of a part does anger play when it comes to ADD?

Does lack of impulse control (emotion: anger) mean that he will always be this way and my future children will have to see me suffer through it or else suffer through it themselves? Or are there methods/meds to help this?

"Mean nature"... I've read that on here in reference to ADDers and have often thought that about my ADDer (I don't feel good saying that or even thinking it, but it's true). I know he's not mean (in his heart) but often feel he is because that's how he acts some days... :/

Also, can his moodiness/irritability/anger/impulsiveness follow a cycle? I find some days its there and really bad and other days he's in great spirits! But the contrast is HUGE... Not just 'having a bad day'... more like, 'having a bad day and gonna make everyone around me suffer for it too!'.... :(

Please, positive input would be greatly appreciated!!!