I have been married to an ADHD guy for 5 years now. We have him in treatment with a counselor and psychologist, but I feel I need to vent. He has demonstrated totally financial irresponsibility. I let him have his own checking thinking it would teach him to be responsible, pay his bills, etc. I found out he has been withdrawing money without me knowing to to pay for expensive car parts on paypal and having them delivered to his job so I wouldn't know. I am unemployed and have been taking out my savings to survive and cover the bills. I was wondering why my savings was disappearing so fast! It's because I have been paying the bills why he buys whatever he wants. I finally caught him, of which he lied about up the end when I finally got into his account, then he giggled and knew he was caught. Now he insists on going for a trip this week to trade more parts with friends he met online, the gas alone with be $100. I told him we can not afford this and he said he is doing it anyways even if he has to take out money and bounce the acct. I checked his acct (which my name is on also) and he has bounced his acct so much since Jan we have payed 1k in bank fees! Part of this is my fault, I grew up in an alcoholic home and I tend to be a person who "fixes" things or "enables." I have covered up for his irresponsibility to the extent that now I have lots of money on my credit card and I can't get anything payed off. I told him that I am to take over the finances and he said yes that he is not good at that. But now he is insisting that he go on this trip and will take the money out no matter what I say. I told him that I felt as if he was stealing from me because I had to cover everything with my money while he spent all on himself. He said its not stealing it was "his" paychecks! I am very concerned about my financial future. He's pushing us into homelessness at this rate. His ADHD has never manifested in this uncontrollable spending spree. His counselor talked to him and said she thinks he is in a "manic" phase and wants to talk to his psychologist. Manic? I mean does that come with ADHD or is that something else. Whatever he has is severe and u know the lying, selfishness, etc. It's really got me thinking how to protect my financial self when everything we have has mostly both our names on the accounts. I don't want to enable him but If stuff doesn't get paid than its my future on the line as well.