I am wondering if any of the people have the same experience as I do. Namely, my adhd partner can get extremely angry if I ask him to cheer me up. He tells me tht my moods are my responsibility and that comforting me when I am sad is not something he signed up for. Furthermore, he compares my sadness (not related to his behavior) with the situation where he gets angry, telling me that I am not comforting him when he is angry either. I am a little bit confused, since I think him being angry and telling that everybody around him is an asshole, is slightly different thing. However, it could be just a different reaction to the emotionally loaded situations- he gets angry and blames everyone else and I get sad and think that me and my life is so bad.
My real problem is that whenever I ask for his support, often times instead he gives me more criticism as to how I have put myself to the situations which consequences I am no suffering from. I can understand this, I sometimes do the same when he is angry. However, he goes on, by telling me how angry it makes him, that I am now trying to make him become responsible for something I have obviously created myself. Even when he actually does comfort me, I often times have to pay the price later, when he announces how he is so supportive and I am not (do nto comfort him when he is angry either to me or someone else). Furthermore, he goes on, saying that I never take responsibility for my feelings, I do not even leave him alone when he has a stressful period (I asked for 15 minutes of communication) and overall, I am constantly being critical of him (mostly pointing out when he is critical of me).
Something in this situation feels wrong. I am now scared to ask for his advice or emotional support. I feel that I have to handle everything on my own and in addition deal with his regular criticism. It does not really feel good.
Thank you for your responses!