Nearly 29 and still a Violent 5yr old

Lastnight my ADHD husband tried to pick a fight with me in the store. He was tired from working long hours and was clearly a grumpy child in need of a nap. He's also as violent as a 5yr old, mind you. He'll punch walls, swear enough to make a sailor blush, swing his arms wildly, and give people death stares when HE hits THEM. Not to mention try to pick fights. He started to pick one with ME last night, by claiming that I was looking at the space between his eyes? He looked like he was about to raise his fist and sock me one. How on earth he came to that assumption I have no idea (I wasn't even looking there?), and I have no idea why even looking at the space between someone's eyes is a bad thing? I'd been trying to calm him down for the span of 15 minutes, but when he finally knocked the item I was holding out of my hand and onto the floor, I had had it. I picked it up, put it back, then promptly left the store and walked home, leaving him in the dust. I seem to remember he shouted at me that it was MY fault, and not his - one of his catch phrases. So we returned separately, I ate my dinner silently, then I then spent the night in the spare bedroom and haven't talked to him since.

I've posted elsewhere before... my husband is nearly 29 and still goes about his daily life with untreated ADHD. (and like everyone else here, it drives me nuts)

I've had to forgo so many things because of him. I gave up on having a wedding ceremony, a honeymoon, and sometimes I just can't even leave the house with him. And we've only been married for nearly a year! I can't believe how quickly everything flipflopped from the day he romanced me. Not to mention how much of my life has honestly turned to shit since he came into it. I've read up on ADHD to try to understand him, and I really try hard. I think he honestly loves to punch and fight. I have tried to avert his energy in good ways, I have tried to keep thinking and talking positively... but he lies and makes accusations, all just to try to provoke me! I hate to blame the music, but he does listen to Heavy Metal / Death Metal / Black Metal on a regular basis. He's also been telling me lately that he wants to go to a concert just so he can punch and kick people in the mosh pit.

In this past year he has also been bugging me to start a family and have kids. But he has ZERO respect for me lately, and he can't even take care of himself. I don't want to be a mother to him and children at the same time. His violent behavior is unacceptable for parenting to begin with. I've also said that I will NOT stop my birth control until he actually see's a doctor about his ADHD. I believe the last time he went for a diagnosis was in elementary school.


I guess I am hoping this mini rant will give me the sanity to deal with him when he wakes up today.