New to this - New Marriage on Brink of Collapse due to ADHD symptoms

I got married about a year ago and was not prepared for the fact that my husband has pretty severe ADHD. I was the one who figured out there was something wrong that he needed to go see specialists. And my suspicion was correct - that he has Tourette's and ADHD. It's been a rollercoaster and a heartbreaking process dealing with it. Had to convince him to go to doctors and finally he was open to it. We got from a neuropsychologist who tested him, to a neurologist, to his primary care doc (who prescribed way too low for some reason) and finally to a psychiatrist. He was taking 25 mg of Straterra for 3 wks but when the psychiatrist advised taking 60mg, he stopped taking meds completely - for a week now. And is hiding it from me. I feel like he is so unstructured, aimless and a mess. Our communication is so broken. I feel so hopeless and depressed. Is there hope in a situation where they stop complying? Is that a normal pattern in their acceptance?