New poster, so frustrated

I've been married for 10 years to a 62 year old man who acts like he is 8 yrs. and helpless.

I run a business, support our household, pay all the bills, manage 2 rental properties, manage a vrbo property, clean the house, manage my employees, manage our bookkeeping efforts, my husband cares for our 2 dogs, that is it. They are not trained and they are both spoiled.  I'm getting angrier and angrier. I feel like I am going to explode. Yesterday was so bad I had heart palpitations and couldn't eat. I am at my wit's end. So here I am, to vent/complain.

These are the issues I nag about daily:

-Cabinet doors left open, drawers left open with things hanging out of them

-Front door left open (recently all night long)

-clothes left on floor right where he removes them

-cups, mugs, glasses left all over the house and yard

-The garage is mayhem, I couldn't park in it for 3 months, finally cleaned it myself

-toilet seat left up almost every time

-his zipper is always down

-speeding tickets (that I wasnt told about) found out from our insurance co.

This list could go on and on...I am told I am a nag, a bitch, control freak, and at times I do feel like I am all of those things. I run a primary school, and ALL of my 4 year olds are more responsible than my husband.

He is great at menial tasks if I give him a list and a pen to cross things off as he goes. Everything he does, even texts take triple the time of a normal functioning adult.

I told him we needed to go to therapy together and deal with this...He told his MD who sent him to a psychiatrist. He diagnosed him with depression, and ADD, put him on Wellbutrin. He lost 20 pounds on it, but no effect on the ADD symptoms. 

He denies everything constantly. The couples therapy is being avoided. He doesn't want to learn how to be better. He does not want to change. In the past 6 years he has been unemployed 3 times and is currently unemployed and has decided to collect social security when his unemployment compensation ends. It's 1/10 of what we need to keep our finances in order. Everything is on me.