"....an ability to rationalize their behavior so that it appears warranted, reasonable, and justified...... a stunning lack of concern for the devastating effects their actions have on others.....they are completely forthright about the matter, calmly stating that they have no sense of guilt, [and] are not sorry for the pain and destruction they have caused which is associated with a remarkable ability to rationalize their behavior." This, I am guessing, is what many of us are coping with in our partnerships/marriages. How ADHD figures into this, I don't know, but it seems to be a part of many of our discussions. I know there are ADHD/ADD people who this does not describe. I know of at least one in my life. This DOES describe my DH and it helps me to know and accept this to know how to respond in my mind to his lack of responsibility and care for his family. This is a real condition outside of ADD as someone else pointed out a few months ago and I have been studying it.