personality changes

I do not have ADHD but my spouse and son both do. My husband recently lost his long time job and has these has these swings of being extremely high energy (wound up, acting childlike..making jokes all the time, singing or playing his guitar while I try to talk to him) OR he is low low..falling asleep in his chair, eyes droopy, etc.

He has anxiety and sometimes takes Clonopin (not sure if that is spelled right) and used to take xanax but i asked that he only take it at night since he becomes zombie-like from it. He also sometimes takes Adderral but not consistently. I am not sure if he could have something else going on mentally because the swings are so pronounced. He also is going through Low T therapy and has been craving sugar in huge amounts.Has anyone else experienced this? Any ideas? It has become extremely hard on our marriage because I get so annoyed and snappy when he is in either state - so I am basically irritated most of the time. I feel like a terrible partner but he is driving me crazy.