I think it may be possible that while my husband knows he has ADD he doesn't think that it affects him much or that he can control it, like he is in denial. The more I read about people's stories/struggles with this disorder the more I recognize similarities in Rick. I email him these stories and I ask, is this how you feel? I do this in an effort to understand him better, and hopefully help him feel better by relating to these inspirational stories, like he is not alone but he always denies any similarities/connection and he gets angry so I have stopped.He says he knows that I am trying to help him, that this is coming from a place of love but he doesn't react to it that way.
Communication between us is like being in a funhouse, smoke and mirrors, completely ineffective. It makes me feel like I am crazy. I have always been a very good communicator, my job depends on it but I get so turned around and confused when Rick and I argue that I end up exhausted and feeling like nothing has been resolved. I am so worried because I am not sure the counselor fully understands, it is so hard to explain and it feels like Rick is not being honest with me, the counselor, or himself. He knows all the right things to say when we are in counseling, he has projected all of the issues I have with him onto me. When confronted with a problem he doesn't answer the question but instead tries to find fault with me. I am genuinely making a real effort here, I want this to work but I feel like I have no control over it, like we are in this crazy spin, I try to slow it down so we can see things better but it just spins faster and faster. Please help, do you have any advice?