Real expectations for new couples


My fiance and i have been dating 3 months (did i say i'm impulsive?), but truly i've found a woman after my heart and im happy to find her, to seek out, and to donate my heart to her every day. we've spent a tremendous amount of time together and we're planning that next step. but truthfully, i've lived a life of self-fulfilling prophesy in that i never felt worthy of love, and i was fearful and anxious about my ability to keep a relationship, and then, consequentially, previous relationships have suffered bc of it. so i have been deliberately alone for a very long time. and consequentially, i'm not very skilled at relationships. sounds like oroboros.

but, i know where i stand with this woman and that is clear. since my thoughts are so foggy so often, i thrive on clarity. and so, we're pushing the envelope. and i've said yes to everything.what a blessing.

but now that we are seeing the effects of my adhd, we're looking for strategies to stay on the front end of this. i take straterra (but maybe there's a better medicine - it makes me so sleepy), i keep an active calendar in use (she has 2 active children), i exercise often (and probably i should find some vitamins to keep up with that), i work at an active job (and it can wear me out and be highly stressful as a general manager of a restaurant - did i say active? 70 hours /week active), i keep a notepad and try to remember the little things that let her know she's important and loved (but i forget the conversation we had 10 seconds ago).


so, stress, fatigue,inexperience, and my own inadequacies or anxieties - these things kind of impact my ability to manage the adhd and i'm looking for suggestions on how to start off on the right foot and stay there.


your help is greatly appreciated.


very respectfully