Besides building communication progress with my DH, and on DH behalf trying to make progress,I still find him scanning the horizon to make us fight,he would come home by me on mornings before going to work to get his breakfast,(I run my business from home), and then leave with a good morning kiss and the days well wishes,but,before doing this he would scan the whole horizon by my work site to see what's undone, like the floor might need sweeping at the time or the yard or anything he could scan to build up an argument with me,to stimulate him,I read about this so it really don't bother me as much as before seeing I know now what is the difference in his thinking,actions,and deeds.(Mind over matter).
He has been doing this ever since he left my home and got his own apartment,I would say that I find that to be sooooo!!! "BOLD FACE"( is he really a man?????? ),,,"NO!!!!!",,, "not at all", men don't do that,in fact a man would help his wife when things are undone or needs doing at the time,but I understand that,that is his ADHD and all the rest of his underlying problem,I feel so sorry for him and I love him for real, and I wish he don't have to do these things to feel some sort of relief that would result(stimulation) in more"depression's"in the long haul,I have been talking to him a lot about ADHD and reading to him on the weekends but,only then and there he would understand it and then two hours later he would forget all i read,saying to him over and over again he needs to go and get help by the professionals with a fast paste to have his ADHD under some sort of level control.Well so far he has been making lots of excuses,well that's left to be seen after his projects is completed then I would really know how for real he is.
Another thing that has been going on for the past length of our marriage is that he wants me to keep "NO" personal contact with his Mother,children mother's,etc,etc no contact with any member of his family that might tell me what he did to them in the past that might cause me to figure out who he was or what he did and he was afraid that he would get"caught"of, "all"his wrong doings,LOL,I know them all when I found out his real problem doing my researches,I still would not have left him even though I found out b/c once he is not a murderer I have nothing to be that fearful about,I believe that the past is the past and that is not"our"future with his ex's and clearly my only past concerns for him is the child abuse and ADHD from childhood thru adulthood that's it! but,he is very wrong to keep me away from his Mother,my mother-in-law I don't like that at all,even though things are not going good with us and I should really try and fix what I have with him before building a next relationship with anyone else,to take across a baked bread and have some tea with her would be nice,but he has not allowed such so far, and that upsets me.
His son would try to contact me through face book and that would upset him also,but,I understand and to tell you the truth the kid is not really bothering me or the mother,is my own free will I want back from him, to do the thing I love best and just socialize,I love him and if he has a son that can talk to me thru face book I find nothing wrong with that.I am being taken away from my own free will to do even the not wrong thing!!!
MADNESS YES boy just pure stupid madness.fedup!!!