I'm the wife and my husband has ADHD. We've been separated for a year and over the last few months I've let go of the anger and have allowed myself to feel compassion for him and love him again thru all the hurt he put me thru. I was pretty much ending the marriage but I do love him and in one aspect I do NOT want to regret NOT giving him a second chance BUT in the same respect, I do NOT want to have those regrets of giving him a second chance IF he hurts me again. I do want to mention that he was very verbally and emotionally abusive and life was a rollercoaster.
I wonder, is he just nice and loving because we've been apart? Or does he really love me enough to respect me? Or is it that he just can't see thru the ADHD. I guess I'm looking for answers that he is an improved person and that he truly recognizes the his actions and behavior. He does now when we are apart but I wonder IF we were together will that all disappear.
I don't have children so this would be a pretty clean divorce so that's why I'm so torn up over this decision. I am going to be livid at myself if I end up in the same place as before. I'm 33, going on 34, I don't have that much time to waste when I would like to start a family. I'm very responsible and emotionally stable to do so...its really him and his problems that I end up dealing with. Mind you, he just got arrested a few weeks ago due to an anger/rage issue. Will stuff like this end or become less? Those types of problems are so unnecessary. I want to worry about building a life not going backwards. Ahhhh, any insight into your experiences would be appreciated. Thanks so much for the time.