My husband (adhd) has withheld loving, gentle, and affectionate demonstrations of emotions because he says he has a very IQ, and he isn't into "those" emotions. So, having a high IQ means you can't show someone how much you love them? That Doesn't make sense. I believe he has CHOSEN to do this.
And, now says it's better if he hangs around with OTHER genius people such as himself, because they understand each other better. This tells me again, how little he has thought of MY intelligence. According to Dr. RUSSELL BARKLEY, IQ has nothing to do with Emotional Intelligence. You CAN be book smart AND also have emotions......meaning all emotions.
It's sad to watch him continue in this facade he's built for himself, instead of just being himself. It was the nerdy, goofy, guy I fell in love with and not the Mr.Genius guy. HE doesn't like the nerdy guy, because nerdy guy isn't "cool" or "sexy", or whatever. So, he acts the way he wants people to see him. What he doesn't uunderstand is that MOST of us see through his facade.
He believes he has little to NO emotions, and has said this many times. But, he shows anger, frustration, hostility, sarcasm, and defensiveness just FINE. So, he DOES have emotions. He just isn't counting showing some of the negative ones AS emotions, which they are.
He also has viewed me as "weaker" for being able to SHOW love, kindness, gentleness, and affection. I wish he understood that showing LOVE, when you want to show anger takes MORE strength than he could possibly know. It seems like he's been stuck in an adolescent view of what true strength really is.
Sorry, just a short rant today, wishing things were different.