So confused, exhausted & hurt.

Hello everyone. I am new here. I am so grateful for the internet and that I’ve come across this page and forum. I have been reading so much and a lot of things are starting to make sense now. My story: I’m a non ADHD wife who’s been married for only 11 months. Our journey together has been a ROLLER COASTER. 3 different councilors and finally this 4th one has diagnosed my husband with ADHD. He should be getting on medication writhing a few weeks. I am really praying that this would be the missing piece. I feel like I am in a emotionally abusive relationship, he could be so cold and mean. I also feel manipulated. I recently got sick and he was upset because according to him he doesn’t wanna see me like that. I feel so unsupported by him. Sometimes I also feel like I’m being used. He’s only interested in what he likes to do which means watch tv, gym, Etc and for the rest I have to basically argue with him then he says I’m controlling and mothering him. My daughter who is 6 from a previous relationship is also now being affected by his behavior. She has been apologizing to me on his behalf and says she feels bad that he is mean to me. He says my relationship with my daughter triggers him and he can’t be around both her and I. He has unhealed past trauma but don’t we all ?!! I can tell he is bothered by her and shuts down. He says it’s too hard for him coming into a blended family. I really feel stuck and divorce has been on the table maybe that’s why now he’s saying he wants to get on medication. When I talk to him he says he doesn’t understand what I mean. He says he doesn’t understand feelings but I’m confused because he understood when he met me. When I try to talk to him he goes off on me and says that I am attacking him and I explain that I’m not and that we are on the same page and need to be able to communicate. People have started noticing and I feel ashamed. I’ve tried talking to others and they recommend that I leave him. Most of the things I’ve read on here describe him. Like we’d be out and he looks perfectly fine and then we get home and he’s feeling down and doubting himself (maybe he thinks people can see the REAL him). That's the only time he actually feels bad when he feels exposed, so he'll feel down for a few days and I go comfort him and once he's back to feeling good he starts being an A hole again. Is there hope with medication ? Is it a normal response to a child ? I don't know what to think anymore. I really don't see a future if he can't get along with my daughter.