So frustrated i feel as though he is going to send me to my grave!

Does anyone have any tips on how to keep a home functional when the ADD partner is home. All his home duties are is to maintain the yard and clean up his mess after him. Too much to ask for i think.

* I would complain about the yard and he would decide he would start mowing the lawn at 9pm (at night) mind you he would not complete this and leave it in a worser state than it already was and un completed. We are renting and i dont want to loose our home cause part of the agreement was to have the yard maintained

* Doors/cupboards constantly left open

* He would cook himself a meal and leave margarine and all the dirty plates on the bench and sit and eat then leave that plate where he ate and then proceed to go into the loungeroom and forget about the dirty plates and kitchen...arrggghhhh!!!!

* He would organise his things last minute and while we are rushing to hurryup to make his flight for work, he is still walking around slowly in his boxers as if time stood still for him

* DRIVING- OMG!!!! Constantly speeds and plays with the stero, ipod and even decides to tex while he is driving with ALL of us in the car

* Arguments- He would always go that one step further to the point of no forgiveness

The constant pushing, and pushing to get what he wants is making me tired, im trying to run a functional home. 

Am i just meant to ignore this?? Are there ways to manage this behaviour and have a happier home?

 

 

Some things i have attempted to do..to help ??

Also i forgot to write that i have tried to incorporate this into our family home to help with my partners ADD

* Because he was eating badly and made every excuse to eat out, i made a menu roster at home stuck it on the fridge so that he could see the meals set out, this did help as he was pulling the meat and ingrediants out to prepare the meals

 

* Shopping/Groceries: He would go and do food shopping and come back with another 100 dollars of other food that would just stay in the fridge till it went off (compulsive spender) so i started to over take the shopping for groceries so when he was home from work there was no need for him to go to the shops

 

*Budgets: He was a bad spender, we nearly lost our home before the one we have now cause the rent wasnt paid. he would transfer money out of my account to his and wouldnt tell me. Until i saw the bank staement!! arrgg!!!! So i changed the pins on my cards, i gave him a budget of 100 dollars a week to spend on watever i dont care, but until he learns the value of money i would slowly increase nthis. TRUST ME it is very hard for me as he would spend his 100 and try and find another way to get more money from me, even cause arguments..this i struggle with constantly

 

* Family Meetings (Weekly): Which involves all of us in the family to discuss our budgets, routines and discuss issues that didnt work well the previous week ..this i find helps as we all have a chance to discuss ways to better the situations even my son

 

Still work in progress but its a small start..baby steps but if anyone has any other suggestions for the top issues i raised please let me know as i want a functional home without the sadness