Hey everyone - so i ended up on this site like a year ago when a therapist of mine mentioned to me in passing that she thought my husband was ADHD just based on some of the anecdotes about him I shared....i didnt really ever look up what ADHD was or anything so once I did after that, i was totally floored how uncanny the traits were, and I also found this site.
My husband has acted miffed in the past when i tell him that he is ADHD, even when i have described many things to him and he HAS to know that is way too many of his traits for it to be BS.
Anyway, so we were going out of town this weekend (AND its the end of the month and my husband is in sales)....double doozy - my husband at the end of the month can be a bit of a terror and my husband when we're trying to pack stuff and pack the car to go out of town is also a terror. Both things are an enormous source of drama bc my husband gets so impatient and edgy and tense in these situations and inevitably whenever we go out of town, we get in at least one argument over nothing while packing the car - the fight is always bc hes a tense A$$ hole to me over NOTHING and so i get irritated and tell him to stop talking like that, theres nothing to be this stressd about, calm down, etc.
Well, he started coming down with a cold on Thursday (actually being sick makes him a nightmare usually, too!) but this time he went and got the most intense sudafed stuff at the store that has all the stimulants in it and everything. He took that steadily from thirsday night through saturday afternoon on the trip. let me tell you, HE WAS A FREAKING DELIGHT!!!!! He was his calm, sweet, un-edgy self in any and all situations, including the ones where e typically is inexplicably pissy and tense. We packed the car without incident, he didnt have this impulsive urge to micromanage and freak out over nothing, etc. we got caught in come traffic jams and he reacted like it was nothing (bc it wasnt) instead of acting liek the sky is falling if you hit some traffic when you have noehwere to be at a certain time - like he normally does.
I dont know, he was just TOTALLY patient and at ease and sweet the whole weekend. I even noticed (we were camping with friends) that sitting around the campfire he did less monopolozing of conversation, listened well, paid attentiont o people, etc., and also rather than staying p till 4 am talking peoples' ears off....he said at like 10:00 that he was tired, and went to bed. He was like a totally peaceful, at ease version of himself.
THEN, on sunday morning we get up and he is out of sudafed and starting to feel better and let me tell you he was back to his tense self - getting the car packed up to leave (even though again, we had no time constraints or things to be home for, etc and it was 8 am) was an enormous stressor for him - and even though i was driving and knew how to get home, everything was tense for him, he was repeatedly impatient, etc. ...multiple times i said something and hes looking at his phone and doesnt hear me, etc.
Long story short, he was amazing on thursday through saturday, EVEN with the traveling, EVEN with the end of the month work stress, EVEN with the cold - and the medicine made him that way. Could he really maybe benefit from some medicine? I wasnt sure what those ADHD meds did for people but now i am thinking it may help him. i mean even on friday he tells me "im so stressed this morning trying to follow up with everyone and get this all done by the end of the month"....but like, he articulated what stressed him in a calm, normal, mature manner and seemed to be totally keeping it together - rather than his usual appraoch to that stress, which is to not acknolwedge it, act like a dramatic terse brat, and then INSIST that everything is fine if you ask him if he is ok or if work is getting to him.
I dunno i am just totally floored - we may have to talk about this someitme but i dont want him to get offended! he told me saying he may have ADHD was "finding flaws in him" and that's simply not true.