On a Timer

Pulling away... I read many posts and hurt for you all.  Clearly I can't be clear.  Words just don't do the job.

It sounds as though you plan

It sounds as though you plan to hurt or kill yourself.  Please do not do so.  If you have the ability to harm yourself, then you have the ability to save yourself.  Please contact a mental health professional or your physician or nurse to get help.

No

That is not what I said.

I hope this means that you

I hope this means that you are not contemplating suicide.  I wasn't sure, but when it sounds to me like someone is expressing suicidal thoughts, I respond accordingly.  You do seem to feel quite desperate.  Is there anything we can do here to help?

I am contemplating leaving

I am contemplating leaving this place and going away where I can be alone by choice.  As I said maybe the convent where I grew up or some far away place.  I have traveled plenty and know there are plenty spaces to be alone...by choice, not by ADHD.  I thought I was specific.  I am tired of "hope"... I need flat out ...what? realism.  Here we can give each other a few kind words, virtual company...but it is a plain fact..isn'y it? If the ADHD person doe snot move nothing moves...and when they move they require patience, understanding..etc.... the burnt out non-add-er has to keep going unfueled.  Right? In the "hopes" that it might get better... But does it ever?  I read about learning to cope, to accept,.... as the best case scenario.  You can give if you are fueled...what do you do if you are not?

If you can leave, I think

If you can leave, I think that is a good thing to do.  I didn't mean to convey that staying with your partner is your only option.  If you are able to go someplace where you can get the space and peace you need, I'm all for it.  Some people on this forum will never say that leaving one's partner is OK, but I think it depends on the situation.  I should probably end my marriage; I just haven't gotten sufficient courage to do so yet.