You can look at my username history and see that I've posted many times here.
I feel the need to get this out, just need to vent to the only people I can trust to know what I'm talking about. NO ONE in real life has any clue what I've gone through married to this man.
I feel utterly trapped. Going on 25 years in 2017 of marriage to a childish, immature, person who has been unemployed nearly this entire time. He is unable to support himself. Without me, he wouldn't have insurance. He wouldn't have a roof over his head. He wouldn't have a basement to store all his toys in.
I feel nothing but apathy towards him. I have zero sexual desire for him and yet he continues to push that - just thinking of being intimate with him makes me tired.
I can't rely on him for even the simplest things. If he says he's going to do something, I just mentally put it on my list. He gets angry if we remind him to do stuff that he's volunteered to do. Our entire family knows if they need something done they come to me.
He thinks he can fix computers - nope. Our network at home is complete crap and we've been telling him for a year. Every day he tells us he's going to fix it, nothing. Of course you can read the Storage Saga in my history; at this point he's so volatile about it, it's become a mental health issue for him. He tells me he's making progress, I just nod my head and figure that when he dies I can finally get rid of it. I can't just stop paying for it, as it does have some of my stuff (maybe .05 of what is in there).
I can't get him life insurance because he's got so many pre-existing health conditions. I would have to pay $250 a month for the tiniest amount.
I would probably end up paying alimony for him if I kicked him out finally.
I can't stand listening to him ramble on and on about all his "ideas". He talks more than anyone I have ever met. He's obnoxious and annoying. I can't talk to him about anything that's "serious" or adult; I just do all that stuff on my own for the kids and he just keeps playing with his action figures.
I have utterly wasted my life on this man. I can't think about the future with him, but I'm stuck.
Maybe when the youngest graduates I can figure out what to do? There's got to be more to life than putting up with this.