two steps forwat 5 step back

So I am the ADHEer and I thought I was doing right by focusing on our marriage but I guess I was hyper focusing, Now I feel like I have just taken a big leap back, among other things I still don't know how to please my wife, I feel like I have to walk on egg shells around her I am so scared of losing her it is driving me nuts. Yes on meds Yes seeing a therapist, but marriage is still a question of I DON'T KNOW, I am so afraid the she might be having other intentions. any non-adhd spouse have any advice how to comfort and give relief to my wife.