Submitted by Libby on 08/20/2018.
I am to the point of ultimatum with my DH. So so very exhausted. Failing to understand and probably failing to care anymore. I live with my a severe hearing loss and take full responsibility in managing it. I guess I look at ADD as a disability also. What would our married world look like if I refused to acknowledge my disability. If I refused to wear hearing aids. If I was in total denial and pretended there was nothing wrong with my hearing. Not sure what I am trying to say except I do not lie about my physical issues. Why should he!
I have an appointment with a counselor on Thursday. I am hoping for wisdom and support no matter what choices I decide to make.
I understand Libby....
Submitted by c ur self on
No Ownership....Justification....and Denial....are things we can't work with.....The only antidote I've found for it, is to accept it, walk away, breathe and live.....
Blessings, Prayers, and Hugs!
c
I hear you. ADHD does not end
Submitted by Lost Wife on
I hear you. ADHD does not end marriages, denial does. It sounds like you know what you want, and you should trust yourself. I think taking a stand and following through is what many of us who end up stuck in marriages with ADHDers who are in denial/won't manage symptoms lack. I've taken many a stand, but never actually left. All it did was show him he could push those boundaries further and further, and as much as I just want to blame him for not changing, I was the one who LET him get away with it all so long.
Good luck to you, and follow your heart!
Lots of affirmation coming your way
Submitted by Brindle on
You said it - you work to manage your disabilities, and he should do the same. Lost Wife is right - ADHD isn’t the problem so much as denial is.
We had big problems when neither of us even suspected he had ADHD or really even knew what ADHD was. But now that we do know, he is digging his heels in, saying he doesn’t have any interest in working on things. Ok, then. Now the truth of who he is as a person is clear. He’s telling me who and what he is, and it isn’t someone who will work on a marriage.
I’m sure by now you’ve had your appointment. How did it go?