There has been a lot of good discussions on the forum lately, with some very good research behind it...But, instead of looking at the effects of adhd on my marriage; I would like to pose this question. Do you and your spouse have different values?
I ask because on the surface it may seem that you agree on a lot...But, I find with my W, that one of the many major hindrances' in communication is we think (assume) we are speaking the same language. But in reality we are not. I have come to realize that even w/ the presents of blame and denial much of the impasse for us relates to different values...If two people have different values they can hear what they think is agreement, but in actuality your minds may be far to the right or left of each others. I know for us this happen's often, we think we covered something then we find out we have different understandings...Does adhd cause this? I think indirectly it can have some effect. But, it's not the primary cause of Values and Convictions...
I don't want to cloud this up w/ details, I just wanted to throw this out for consideration....Are you and your spouse's Values causing misinterpretation of assumed agreements?