This has been scaring me lately and I know it is an ADHD problem, so I'm hoping someone else has dealt with this and found a way to approach their ADHD partner with it gently, but clearly. Basically, my concern is my husband is sending the message to our children that technology is more important than them. He eats as quickly as he can to go off to the TV, even while the rest of us are still eating. He brings his iPad to the table if I ask him to sit through a whole meal and pretty much tunes us out. It really hit home with me when the following happened tonight: My 15 month old daughter, who has been walking for a little over a month, but is still wobbly, walked over to our TV stand, must have tripped and banged her chin on the edge of the stand. This coincided with something on the TV switching off, which I'm pretty sure my daughter didn't do - she didn't touch the TV itself. My husband, however, got extremely frustrated that the screen had changed. I was holding my daughter while she cried (she was more shaken up over it than anything - there was no bleeding or bruising) - and all he could do was huff and puff over the few buttons he had to push to get the show back on. Our 4 year old son observed this whole scene. I made a comment to my husband about this, how our daughter was in pain and he was getting upset over the TV. He didn't respond to the comment, but I'm hoping it sunk in.
I don't know. I just feel like I'm going in circles with this. Talking to him about the whole leaving the table thing to watch TV, him telling me we eat too slowly, he hates waiting, he's just passing time until we're done, etc., etc. But really, I feel like his closest relationships are through technology (i.e. the guys he plays online video games with at night, anyone who texts him, etc.). Am I hurting the children by staying and having them feel second fiddle to a TV, or is it worse to leave and take them away from their dad who can be wonderful with them at times when he tunes into them? When it was just me and him, I didn't notice this somehow, but it is crystal clear to me with our kids. Any help, experiences, suggestions, etc. would be greatly appreciated!