I'm not quite sure what has changed at my house lately, but in the last few weeks my DW's shields have seemingly dropped to a level I've not seen in a long time. It seemed to start about two weeks after the whole "Car Misunderstanding" with me asking her how much weight she had lost. I know this seems like an easy thing to say as a compliment, but weight has been a Hot Topic for so long that I did not ever make a compliment referencing her weight. I was tired of the old Groundhog Day weight arguments and noticed how much she had lost and said "Screw It" I'm going to ask how much she has lost and tell her how good she looks. I was kind of met with a reluctant response of "thanks, but I've only lost 24 lbs, not 90". I immediately reminded here that she always said she just wanted to lose 30 lbs and she would be real happy at this weight. I, on the other hand was 80 lbs overweight. Maybe she began talking to a friend at work or somebody else, but things have started improving since.
My marriage has stopped being a "Room Mate" situation, one of my other major issues, and I just cannot believe it. I have not done anything different lately, it just seems that "Little Positives" seem to be adding up and turning everything in a Much Needed positive direction!
Well... I am happily reporting a positive ADDer / Non-ADDer relationship that is trending upwards :)
Congratulations :)!
Submitted by ADHDMomof2 on
This is great news! I'm sure the weight loss must be helping her confidence, and her libido, too! Good luck, YYZ, with continued success here! You deserve it!
Thanks!
Submitted by YYZ on
I keep trying not to over-analyze things, but is sure nice to see things improving all of a sudden. It is amazing how fast anxiety levels can drop with a few good days strung together :)
Fantastic! That's news that
Submitted by Pbartender on
Fantastic!
That's news that gets my hopes up a little too... just the sort of thing I needed to hear this morning. Here's hoping that it keeps going well.
Pb.
Reading Between the Lines...;)
Submitted by ADHDMomof2 on
Giggling because I've read your posts about high sex drive, which is something YYZ and I share with you... Hope it gets better for you, too, dude! Not laughing AT you...I'm in the same situation...
Better...
Submitted by YYZ on
Retiring the "Room Mate" status one of the "Pluses" worth waiting for ;)
Between the lines... Or between the sheets? :P
Submitted by Pbartender on
That wasn't exactly my intent... I find my own situation to be exceptionally similar to what YYZ's had been like. At this point, starting out, and needing all the self-motivation I can, I take comfort in the fact his hard work is paying off.
I can't honestly say I'd complain, however, were I to find myself in similar circumstances in the end.
:D
Pb.
Lines or Sheets
Submitted by YYZ on
Between the Sheets > Between the Lines :D
I am still wondering what has suddenly caused the upswing, because I want to make sure I keep doing/saying whatever it is. My diagnosis was about 3 years ago, so this has been a long time coming. Maybe the anger/frustrations have had enough time to heal, maybe my symptoms are better controlled, my communication does not suck as bad as it used too. I'm just glad to feel a jolt of hope for us right now.
Hang in there Pbartender, it can get better ;)
chuckling here :-) good
Submitted by funnyfarm on
chuckling here :-) good for you. A lot of little positives can add up to a Big change for the good. Same as a lot of little negatives have the opposite effect. Keep up whatever you are doing. Its so good to hear people who are making progress.
You Go Boy!
Submitted by ellamenno on
Great news YYZ!
I remember your posts about your DW being upset about weight issues and thinking you 'got the easy way out' because Adderall helped with the weight-loss... What a tricky situation for you!
For me, unfortunately, I was not so heavy to begin with so all it did was make my wardrobe useless and my t!ts disappear.... NOT so sexy. Oh well. Now I eat as much as I can in the hopes that I can (re)fill my bras!!
keep up the good work!
ellamenno
Thanks Ellamenno!
Submitted by YYZ on
It has been a long time coming for our self esteem cycles to be in sync. Maybe after three years some of the trust is coming back. I lost the weight for nobody else other than me and only cared the she liked my lighter look.
What you describe about losing weight is so true. You lose pounds from where you don't want to lose and the loss from problem areas is Always the last to go ;)
self-esteem cycles...
Submitted by ellamenno on
I guess I'm lucky in that my DH has never had self esteem issues. Me, on the other hand.... that's what started my sleuthing into 'what the hell is wrong with me?'
I REALLY felt weird when people would ask about the weight. When I first moved here I lost 15 lbs just by moving to a 'walking city' from a 'driving city' plus, i was losing pregnancy weight. But then, when I started getting remarkably thin i'd get comments like, "Wow! You look great! are you doing pilates???" This was from people who hadn't seen me in years, but the people I saw regularly thought i'd suddenly gotten ill. *sigh*
DD#1 just sat in my lap. I told her I was writing a message. She said, "Look! You got a message from a pirate, mommy!!!"
heehee!
Shiver me timbers!
well, wishing you continued success!
Ellamenno
similar med, different side effects effect
Submitted by ADHDMomof2 on
Ellamenno,
Love the lack of filter;). The T to A ratio is not to be underestimated! I've been on meds where my tatas started to disappear...NOT cool... They are back, though. Whew...
Have you tried Vyvanse? It's very similar to Adderall except how quickly it's absorbed. Personally, I was tired on Vyvanse, but I know others who are fine with it. I did not find it suppressed my appetite as much, either.
filters?
Submitted by ellamenno on
aint no filters here, honey!
We don't need no stinking filters!!!
Submitted by YYZ on
Ha ha! You guys keep it up... I've got to go practice my Pirate alphabet ;)
Speaking of Unnecessary Filters...;)
Submitted by ADHDMomof2 on
Is "practice my pirate alphabet" code for sex;)?
Practice makes perfect...
Submitted by YYZ on
Well... I think it will be now. That's pretty funny ;)
Congrats!!
Submitted by Haps on
This is great to hear, XYZ!!! I've been out of the loop for a few , and this is a very encouraging and exciting thing to see!! Please keep us posted on things, and I'll be sending positive vibes your way!!