I'm now talking to those of us who have ADHD ........and it's addressing the very thing that I think that many us fail to see or remember in important moments when dealing with our spouses, partner's or SO's... especially!
Because our minds are in constant motion with difficulty turning it off or changing directions.....we need to mindful that we do not assume that everyone else is like this....which is painfully obvious at this point. Just a few words to state what I feel is not getting said from the inside looking out........
Just because we're use to non stop thoughts racing through our minds 24/7.......doesn't mean everyone else is used to it and most likely not. Assume the last sentence.
Just because we're use to our roller coaster of extremes in thinking and emotions ( the highs and lows).......doesn't mean everyone else is like this too. More like comparing someone who's use to riding their bike on the interstate in Nebraska and someone who's use to competing in the Tour de France in the alps.
And, just because we only know what it's like to have ADHD in every aspect of it and are use to being this way since that's all we know. This pretty much assures that for everyone else.....this will be quite different and demanding on them to suddenly get pulled into trying to be like us, think like us or to try and understand or keep up with us.....or nor would anyone want to.
But.....that's all we know...... and you do get use to anything if that's the way you've been from that first day you took your first breath. They say that some people suffer from it? All I can say is.....I don't suffer from having it because I'm use to it and don't know the difference. I'm fine with that much. I understand the difference, but I don't know what that's like. I've suffered at times from the consequences of having it.....but not from the actual experience having of it. I think that's a fair statement coming from someone who does see the difference even if I don't know exactly what it feels like to not have ADHD.
I remember when I first started taking Adderall....and it occurred to me after a time that "this must be what it's like to be/feel like everyone else?.....kind of like getting a prescription for eyeglasses for the very first times and simply being able to see things in focus......not like that.....just like that. I never knew what that was like until that day.
I encourage any person with ADHD to consider this as a way to stop thinking that there is something wrong with other people when they complain that it's such a shock on them in many ways to be with us.
Being use to it is not saying that we like it ....many times we don't like it either. I've heard and read comments indicating that this thinking is possibly true. ( that we like having ADHD ) This might get interpreted by others in our struggles to stay positive and try and not look at the down side and focus on the good parts. There are some good parts too....actually, there are some really good part and it does feel good especially when other people find those good parts out about us and like them too...... but certainly not all of it.
And those same parts we don't like.....other people don't like too. We have to live these parts....other people do not. We need to keep this in mind on a daily basis.
The one undeniable fact that we need to keep in mind for the sake of others is......we are use to it.....everyone else is not.
I've found this to be a very helpful reminder to myself at times when I start to feel anything that goes contrary to this one simple fact.
That's what is not being said...so now I said it. lol