What is ADD/ADHD??????

Or rather......what isn't ADD/ADHD?  Does anyone really know?  I don't really know either but I'm sure I have it (me ADHD) according to my therapist and everything I've learned and read about it over the last 10 years.  I fit the list of criteria perfectly.  I pass all the tests with flying colors.  Other people say I act or behave like I have it.....you know what they say?  Who are they THEY anyway?  Are They the ones who made up the concept of PC?  Actually...that was the Moral Majority (which are neither).  Are They the ones who decide social constructs?.....the ones who decide one day what was good is now bad....and then later, neither one instead???  Sounds like a carnival ride?  I don't think I trust what they believe I am whoever They are.  I don't even know them and they certainly don't know me.

Every person that I have ever met who says they have ADHD are completely different than me in almost every way except for a very few similarities.  Maybe that's a clue?  Let's see......likeable, talkative and open, active, has lot of interests, good sense of humor, not good at house work.  Sounds more like a dating sight profile?

Is ADHD all the things that your parents said about you when you were growing up?  One of my favorite quotes from the late Frank Zappa was..." if you had realized just how lame your parents really were when you were young you would have killed them in their sleep."  He was joking of course but he raised a valid point.  I've pretty much discounted most of the things my parents said that "I was" by now......most of the time in fact, mine didn't know shit about noth'in...it's true!

Is ADHD the collective complaints made by all of the non spouses on this forum?  That would be: a lazy, lying, ,cheating, messy, disorganized, spaced out, video game addicted, alcoholic, pot smoking, drug addicted, unemployed porn addict....who is also an insensitive, self centered, self absorbed narcissist who is not very bright with a bad memory and is angry all the time.  Sweet Jesus.....who wouldn't be angry with that list of accolades!! Did I miss anything?

Can anyone really tell if someone  has ADD or ADHD just by looking at them?  Do we really act different, talk different than everyone else?  Couldn't you apply any one of the character traits listed above to literarily anyone any where?

 Is it a disorder?...and just what constitutes a disorder different from a group of personality traits.  Why do some who have it do well...and others who do not? 

Is it a learning disability?  I had difficulty with math in high school....does that count?

If all the books and literature written by people who research and study ADD/ADHD keep changing every few years...couldn't a person make the assumption that what is believed today will be different some time in the near future? I have to keep reminding myself every time I go to the doctor when he is just about to stab me with a syringe that......he only practicing medicine.  When will they ever get to the place when they stop practicing and get it right?  And what if they are wrong?  Who ever THEY are!!

All I know for sure about myself is that I am fundamentally a hard working good person who makes a genuine attempt to live by the golden rule.....and routinely walks into the next room and asks myself....." what did I come in here for?"


Please...if anyone knows the one definitive answer to this questions I would greatly appreciate it........I can use the sleep. Thanks