What to do about the consequences

I've learned over the past 7 years of marriage to an ADHD man that it's very hard to not constantly supervise what he is doing.  This makes him angry, he says I'm bossy and always telling him what to do.  But so many times I have been burned by the consequences of letting him handle a situation on his own that it's very hard not to oversee everything all the time.  We are married so the mistakes he makes more often than not affect me too.  Because I'm his wife I can be held responsible for his bad decisions and his debt so it's hard not to make sure things are being done properly.  My H has never really cared about his credit or paying bills on time so I don't trust him to handle issues relating to our finances.  But I feel like I need to check on everything else too because I never know for sure if he will finish what he starts or be responsible in the manner in which he is handling it.  I know this makes him feel like less than a man and he says i don't respect and trust him to handle things on his own.  But how am I supposed to let him take full responsibility when I so often suffer the consequences of him not following through or not doing it right?