Since H hasn't worked in 3 months he thought we should look at our finances one night and cut what we could. I thought "Great, we'll take an hour and spread all our bills out on the kitchen table and go over them one by one. Well what was I thinking?! His idea of going over finances is sitting on the couch in front of the tv and opening up a few websites on the laptop to see what we owe. His attention is mostly on the tv and after a couple of websites he basically goes "Well we'll just have to cut back on grocery shopping or something then." He had no desire to go over each bill and find a solution. This is why we can never have a conversation about money because he has no patience to talk about how to cut back and just says "We'll stop going out to dinner" and then 2 days later he wants to go out for dinner! Or we'll buy $100 worth of groceries and come home and he'll want to order a pizza!
When H told me we need to sit down an look at our finances, this isn't what I was expecting!
Submitted by Anonymous (not verified) on 08/10/2015.
Different details, same
Submitted by PoisonIvy on
Different details, same feelings: I pay almost all the bills in the family and my husband then reimburses me for his share. My paychecks go directly into the bank by direct deposit; he gets paid in cash and sometimes walks around for weeks with thousands of dollars in his wallet. I know the dates I get paid and the dates all bills are due. I know approximate amounts for repeat expenses (e.g., utilities, phone) and I check the credit cards, which I share with our daughters, almost daily. Last week, my husband made a snarky comment about him not knowing where the money goes. I got very upset and still am upset about this. I've given him details, time and again, about what I earn and what our joint expenses are. I've sent him hard copies of credit card bills and the bank account statement (which he has the same access to as I do). I don't even know exactly what he's paid and I certainly have no idea what he spends money on. Aargh!!!
My wife doesn't worry about money
Submitted by ThisIsMyLife on
My wife doesn't worry about money. That's for me to do.
We have a joint account so she is generally ok as we have direct debits for bills, but if there's something adhoc to pay for I have to do it and then never see the money back. She.owes me thousands of pounds.
She doesn't check the account and just spends. Recently she bought things for my son from that account. I have now found that there not enough money to pay his childcare fees.
We have our own accounts for anything that's not a regular bill and the idea is we should reimburse eachother but it never happens.
The frustrating thing is that I know she has way more savings than I do because I have paid for every home improvement, our wedding, honeymoon.
She lies about what happened to money too. I know her Dad has sent her cheques towards lots of things that I have paid for and she tells me they were paid into the joint account. They haven't as I check our accounts regularly.
Luckily we both have well paid jobs. I hate to think what would happen if we didn't.