Submitted by Heather1026 on 04/23/2014.
I was just googling my new medication and I saw an ADHD and Marriage site. I thought that's cool. Maybe they would have ideas for my and my husband. We are very happily married and he is ok that I come from the "dark side". I am afraid of some of these comments! So my "type" shouldn't get married? Is this an anti ADHD cult? I would love to chat, but I am afraid!! Just so y'all know, my type is not evil....
Heather, not at all
Submitted by dedelight4 on
Dear Heather, I'm very sorry if you felt this is an anti-ADHD site. By NO MEANS is this site against those who have ADHD. There are many of us who are married to someone who has add, and we have spent many, many years with relationship problems that have stemmed from undiagnosed and untreated ADHD. This left all of us with unresolved hurts and issues that we are now trying to work out. We are all trying to help one another, and understand all the ins and outs of this condition and just life in general. I hope you stay here and read Melissa's posts that are SUPER ENCOURGING, as well as other people who share stories about their own lives having and managing ADHD. Thanks for your post. You are very welcome here.
Hi DeDe!
Submitted by Heather1026 on
Holy Hannah! Some of the later dated posts had my eyes popping out of my head! But, reading further, some (lots) have been dealing with some major clowns... They don't not give us ADHDr's a good name. I mean, I have my quirks, but I try to dole out my crazies one at a time... I have to say that some of the posts are quite funny.... I work, have kids, I even do LAUNDRY (after I take my meds, of course). I know my limits, my husband does all of our financials. We have learned that I can't go to Target with a credit card..... I look forward to meeting y'all over the forums... Just be nice to me!
Heather1026, I'm so glad you
Submitted by MFrances on
Heather1026, I'm so glad you stayed and read some more posts. The other post summed it up very well. Most of us are coming from the perspective of untreated ADHD spouses or newly in treatment and are just looking for encouragement and support and sometimes just to vent (like the slug box thread). There are many topics on this forum, there's one for the spouse with ADHD. You sound like you have a good handle on how to survive and thrive, would love to hear more from you.
HaHa!!!
Submitted by Heather1026 on
It happens to my type... Oh, the absent minded things I have done... You gotta laugh!
Hi, Heather. I'm probably
Submitted by PoisonIvy on
Hi, Heather. I'm probably one of the people whose posts have scared you. I apologize if that is the case. I come to this forum because I've found that there are many people here who understand what it's like to live with a person who does the kinds of things that my husband does. It's not at all clear to me that the things that most bother me about my husband are caused by or related to ADHD. I know other people who have ADHD diagnoses and they seem to function much better than my spouse does. I would never generalize about other people and their lives based on my own experience as a spouse of a person who might or might not have ADHD. However, I do try to offer sympathy to people in situations similar to mine and I try, when I can, to offer advice to people seeking it based on what has worked or not for me.
Panda and Rose..
Submitted by Heather1026 on
After reading a lot of your posts ( Panda's husband doesn't change his underpants and yes, Rose, some of your posts raised my eyebrows) have y'all thought about doing a reality show w your husbands? Put them all in a house for a month and see what happens??? How many ADHD men does it take to change a light bulb? Oh, look! A football game is on!....
I don't know if that would
Submitted by PoisonIvy on
I don't know if that would make me laugh or cry! Really, some of the stuff is laughable (the time my husband decided to take off his pants for a two-hour drive); other of it, not so much (getting fired because he left his work vehicle on and it rolled down a hill and hit a tree). As mad as I get sometimes, I don't have much interest in exposing him to being embarrassed in front of the entire world. Coming here, where I can vent and have his and my identities anonymous, is a great relief.
Thank you!
Submitted by frustratedwife on
Thank you I really needed a good laugh today! I can just imagine that reality show now!
Hi Heather,
Submitted by ColoradoDad on
Hi Heather,
I am a guy with ADD trying to figure out how to save my marriage (though my wife is apparently not interested). I just wanted to throw out there that reading lots of the horror stories on this blog has actually made me feel really good, since by and large, I am nowhere near where some of these poor individuals seem to fall on the scale or spectrum of ADHD or ADD or whatever the heck I've got going on. For example I can be really productive if I just play some music.
Good luck!