Not good enough to stay, not bad enough to leave
I've spent hours reading posts on this forum, like everyone else, your stories of ADD H, could be mine. Just recently realised that ADD is what is going on with H, after our son was diagnosed a year ago. Could never explain H's behaviours, always knew something was different but due to his being a rather avoidant and passive person who doesn't have the anger issues (well external anyway, have since realised he has successfully internalised it into passive aggression), but soon after marriage everything went downhill.