“Sometimes when you plan a little less, you experience a little more.”
- Oprah Winfrey
One of the differences between non-ADHD partners and ADHD partners is that the former tend to like to go from point A to point B in something that resembles a straight line. People with ADHD rarely do this. A few use planning things out in great detail as a way to keep their lives under control.
Yet for anyone who likes to ‘stay on track’ there is much to be gained by learning to savor the journey…celebrating and enjoying what happens along the way, rather than focusing on how it might take longer or upset your schedule.
Living in a straight line is efficient – something that Americans value greatly. But it usually isn’t ‘deepening,’ and that is where a lot of the best parts of relationships lie. When done right, saying ‘yes’ rather than ‘we don’t have time’ can create opportunities to enjoy together, to get to know each other better, to explore new places or ideas, or simply to smile.
Don’t misunderstand me. I’m not suggesting you get to the emergency room in Boston by way of Des Moines. There are times in your life when that straight line is absolutely necessary. It’s just not as often as many non-ADHD partners think it is.
Can you find time to savor the journey this week?
No matter where you are in the world.... you can take my Live ADHD Effect In-Depth Couples' Seminar - starts October 3rd. Register here.
For those in marriages impacted by ADHD
You can find great resources for couples impacted by ADHD at adhdmarriage.com, including: a free online treatment overview; free downloadable chapters of my books; a community forum with other couples facing similar issues; a large number of blog posts on various topics; referrals; and my very popular couples course: ADHD Effect In-Depth Couples' Seminar - This highly acclaimed, eight-session phone seminar has helped many couples turn around their relationship.