Finding Strengths


ADHD & Marriage - Weekly Marriage Tip - February 7, 2014

Heart to Heart

Tips for Thriving in your Marriage

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“Music brings control to my thoughts. It’s not escape – it’s just order. I’m making order out of a disorder…If I was stuck at a different job I’d be horrible and wouldn’t survive.”

-, who has ADHD


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Finding Strengths

Seven-time Grammy winner, notes how perfect his job is for him.  He followed his passion and has had great success.  He’s NOT trying to mediate his weaknesses and become be an accountant or doctor or…  This is the concept behind strengths-based treatment for ADHD.  You treat the ADHD, yes, but you do so while helping the person who has the ADHD find what they are really, really good at.  Everyone has something at which they excel.  For those with ADHD, lots of times these things are creative (music, art, writing, seeing things in new ways, etc.) or related to adrenaline (emergency room work, day trading) or involve physical exertion (athletics, juggling, leading tour groups, building trails at national parks, etc.)

I hope that the ADHD adults in your family have already identified their strengths and find some satisfaction applying them to their work.  If you have children with ADHD, please keep the strengths idea in mind.  It may lead to a unique career for your family (circus performer, dolphin trainer, music writer and producer) but, like has found – a good fit can lead to all sorts of success.

P.S.  Music happens to calm the minds of many with ADHD.  If your ADHD partner listens to music all day long, that may be one explanation.

For those in marriages impacted by ADHD
If you or your spouse has ADHD, please join our forum at to ask your questions and learn from others who share your issues.  In addition, you'll find in-depth essays and a terrific recorded in-depth seminar to help you learn how to thrive in a marriage affected by ADHD.
Hope to hear from you there!
Melissa Orlov

© 2014 Melissa Orlov