MelissaOrlov's blog

If you are one of the people who has repaired your relationship and sees success, consider paying everyone here back by staying a bit involved with the site and posting about your positive experiences.

Are you tired of having your partner point to your ADHD as the source of your marital problems?  I heard this today from a frustrated ADHD client, and it's a common refrain.  Does the label actually matter?  Is the ADHD the source of the issues?  If you are working with a counselor (like me) who specializes in ADHD, does this put too much emphasis on ADHD? It's a legitimate concern that I would like to discuss here.

Being without insurance doesn't have to mean you can't make progress against ADHD.  Here are some specific ideas to keep the cost of treatment as low as possible:

I've just been notified that this site was named one of the top ADHD sites for 2012 by GoodTherapy.org - a site dedicated to helping people connect with a good therapist and explore whether or not therapy is right for them.  I'm delighted to receive the recognition!  And would like to introduce you to their site - if you are considering whether counseling might be right for you, they have lots of articles about what to look for, as well as a list of counselors who might be near you.  (You can also find counselors and coaches I know about for ADHD and ADHD relationship counseling at my list of professional resources.)

Zoe Kessler has posted here before and is a regular contributor to PsychCentral.  She has just posted an interview with a couple in which the non-ADHD partner describes her appreciation for the ADHD essence of her partner - well worth reading!  You can find Zoe's blog and this particular post here.  If you have any thoughts about the positive things you see in your partner's ADHD, please feel free to add them to this entry...I, for one, recognized my husband in much of what this woman wrote.

Too many couples find that Valentine’s Day is a yearly reminder of what they don’t have – the “picture perfect” marriage with both partners arriving home with red roses, a bottle of wine and sex on their minds.  Like in the magazines, right?!  Except that’s not how it happens for many couples, particularly if you are struggling in your relationship.  So here are four tips for surviving what may be the worst Hallmark Card holiday of them all!

Why do partners struggle so much with porn use?  What's the big deal?  This article provides my observations based upon working with couples faced with this issue.

You know that exercise is good for you, right?  But do you know why?

Yes, that sounds like a sales pitch...but it's not.  Happiness is good for our brains and good for handling stress better - in marriages, if you are feeling upbeat you are more likely to be able to take some bumps in the road.  If you're feeling down, pretty much everything seems grim.  Here's a link to a UTube TED talk on happiness that will not only make you laugh out loud, it also has a very important message about happiness.  I urge you to watch it...and also to try two exercises.

This guest blog post has been provided by Hal Meyer and Susan Lasky of the ADD Resource Center.

You fell in love with his boyish enthusiasm, adventuresome spirit and easy-going charm.  Now you are frustrated that he decides to go skiing instead of shoveling the snow off the walkway, or forgets to take the children to the dentist.  You were fascinated by her many interests, creativity and “enjoy the moment” approach to life.  Now you are fed up with the clutter of her incomplete projects, and annoyed by her indifference to planning meals and shopping.  It is easier to love someone with ADHD than it is to live with them.