NedHallowell's blog

     I want to mention a book that is full of fascinating information related to our modern world and attention; a treatment for ADHD that most people haven't heard of; and 3 centers that offer the best, most comprehensive treatment for ADHD (because I designed them!).

     One of the major points my wife, Sue, and I stress in our new book, Married to Distraction, is the critical element of time.  People take time for granted.  But without time, there is no attention, and with attention there is no communication or empathy, and without communication and empathy there is no connection, and without a connection there is no play, and without play there is no fulfilling intimacy, romance, or love.  We often say that play is the main action of love.  But it all depends upon the previous steps, starting with time

     We (Sue, Ned, Melissa) are excited and a tad anxious as we wait to see our books on the stands.  This is like bringing a new baby into the world.  We hope you all like our baby, MARRIED TO DISTRACTION: RESTORING INTIMACY AND STRENGTHENING YOUR MARRIAGE IN AN AGE OF DISTRACTION.  Let us know, ok?  Thanks!!!

One of the most common problems in couples in general and in couples where there is ADD in particular is the inability to make changes.  This is vexing because, as they say in AA, if nothing changes, nothing changes. 

     Hi, Ned Hallowell here.  I am starting to post on this blog again.  I hope I can do it correctly.

     I noticed questions about being distracted during sex.  I saw some great suggestions, from Melissa and others.  Let me add one more thought.

 

Hello!  Ned Hallowell here.  I haven’t posted on this blog in a long while, mainly because I didn’t know how to!  But, Melissa has kindly instructed me, and with luck, this post will get on.  Let’s see!

I  wanted to address a theme I see in MANY posts, and in my practice all the time.  It is the problem of the husband who refuses to entertain that he might have ADD, that he might be contributing to the marital problems, that he might benefit from a consultation with an expert.

Hi - Ned Hallowell here.  I wanted to post an entry about what I think works best in a marriage where one or both partners have ADHD.  The key to it all is insight and empathy.  Once you understand what's going on, then you have to work at really putting yourself in the shoes of the other person.  THIS IS DIFFICULT!!!  Everyone agrees that emapthy is important, but few people do the work to develop it.  It is amazing in how many marriages neither partner truly understands or feels what it's like to live the life of the other partner.  But, if you work at it, you can develop empathy and

One of the most common problems in couples in general and in couples where there is ADD in particular is the inability to make changes.  This is vexing because, as they say in AA, if nothing changes, nothing changes. 

Before the couple gets help, what usually develops is a process of mutual blame.  The minute a conflict arises, each member of the couple hunkers down in a self-protective, defensive posture that says, “It’s your fault, not mine.”  Soon the phrase gets added, “Why bother even trying?  This situation is hopeless.”  Each member of the couple feels isolated, lonely, misunderstood, angry, and at a loss for what to do next other than separate or simply muddle miserably on.