Hi, I'm new here. Recently discovered Melissa Orlov's book and it has been very enlightening. I'm married for 11 years, and my husband has (I believe, especially after reading) undiagnosed/untreated inattentive ADHD. When I broached the topic last week, after googling and realizing he has nearly all the symptoms, he was extremely dismissive, defensive. He does not want to be evaluated or speak to any professional about it. He does not have any mentor he trusts or respects or will listen to. He gets extremely sensitive and defensive any time I bring up any criticism of something he does that impacts me and/or our kids. He has verrrrryyyyy little self awareness (or at least doesn't own it , if he is aware deep down I can't know, but it's doubtful.) I realize now that these are actually typical ADHD symptoms. Whenever I have had enough and bring up a topic that is really frustrating for me, it winds up with him saying I'm too critical and I'm the issue, and I end up feeling confused and like maybe I am the issue... I'm so exhausted. I'm afraid of what he's modeling for our kids. I feel like we are cordial now, not in a close relationship. Has anyone had success helping their spouse acknowledge ADHD after they've shown so much resistance to that?
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