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How to manage communication when the ADHD partner is also the nag/ spiky/ aggressive one?

I am very confused and would really appreciate some help. My wife has ADHD and I am autistic. I have read a lot about couples where the non-ADHD partner can become the organiser and the nag and the ADHD partner feels like the child always being told off. 

However, in my case, my wife has ADHD and is also the nag. She is incredibly intolerant, angry and irritable.

how to handle/support non-ADHD partner

Hi

I'm diagnosed since 2 months and together with my girlfriend for almost 10 years, and we have 2 kids.
Unfortunately we are struggling for some years now (not only undiagnosed adhd, but a lot of stuff that got thrown at us from outside)

Since diagnosis and meds, things have been better and actually steadily uphill until the end of last week....
A conversation triggered me (and my girlfriend then of course) and I felt for days like I wasn't taking meds (took my normal dose).

Is my husband ADHD? Help!

Hello everyone, this is my first post here. I am not a native english speaker so, I apologise for the possible mistakes in writing.

I come accross in this forum because I am wondering if my husband -we first met 18 years ago- could be ADHD. I know this is not the way to get a diagnosis, but I need some help in order to speak about this with my husband and understeand if I can convince him to contact a specialist.

Everything on their terms

I am the non-ADHD spouse and my husband was recently diagnosed with ADHD. We've been together 13 years, married for 8. He finally sought a diagnosis after a few years of impulsive decisions that had a increasing impacts, financially and emotionally, on our family and I was at the end of my rope. He is trying meds and in therapy. I have decided to stick with it with the hope things can improve. This forum has been so enlightening for me and so grateful I found it. So many things said here I could have written myself. 

Meditation for ADD/ADHD

Acceptance is key.  After 50 years of following my well-meaning mother's advice, "Act as if.", I have come to the point in my life that in the case of my husband's ADD, acting "as if" has been detrimental to my well-being.  I now challenge myself to accept reality as it is and heal after years of being ignored by the one person I devoted my life to supporting and loving.  Here is a meditation that I will re-name for those of us who are impacted by ADD/ADHD.  Feed your state of mind and heart to thrive in the face of pain and change to a heart of light and wholeness.  It makes a great start to your new day.  Enjoy:

Google the words "Powerful Guided Meditation for Healing & Letting Go" on YouTube.

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